4 Mistakes to Avoid When Describing Yourself

 

 While we have strong opinions about people we interact with at home or at work, you will be surprised to know that people find it quite challenging to describe themselves. Describing yourself on paper is especially important when it comes to creating your online dating profile or profiles on matchmaking sites.

You are not only expected to describe yourself but do it in such a way that it attracts the right people to show interest or respond positively when you reach people you are interested in.

Here are some of the 4 common mistakes you should avoid when describing yourself.

1. Blowing your own trumpet

The purpose of your online profile is to describe your personality, lifestyle, interests, and expectations. The idea is to sound like a real human being with an emphasis on sounding genuine. Avoid filling up your profile with adjectives or trying to project an exaggerated view of who you are. Nobody likes people who take themselves too seriously. Even if you really are God's gift to mankind, project a little bit of humility when you write about yourself.

2. Beating yourself up

While humility is always appreciated, there is no need to berate yourself in an attempt to sound genuine. Calling out every little physical flaw, personality quirks, family issue (even if it is a passing reference), fears or frustrations, past failures, and failed relationships should definitely be avoided. There is no point in turning people away by sharing a lop-sided view of all the things that did not go well in your life.

3. Focussing too much on your material possessions

While the world around is materialistic and money does indeed attract people, restrain your urge to show off your wealth. Having a profile photo with your fancy supercar in the background or on your Million-dollar yacht sends all the wrong signals and will probably attract people who may be interested more in your wealth. If you are wealthy, there is no need to call it out either through your profile photograph or in your profile write-up. You always have the option to screen people depending on the criteria offered by the matchmaking or dating site you may be using if you are particular about dating or marrying people with a similar social status.

4. Not paying attention to spelling and grammar

When you write about yourself, pay attention to spelling and grammar. Having a well-written, coherent profile free from spelling and grammar mistakes is a fundamental requirement to create a good first impression. That's not all, filling your profile description with slang, acronyms, and truncated words will convey to people that you are not a serious party worth responding to.

A day for you and me.

  

It's only a single day left, for me and you to be together,

The rest we shall be, far apart

Mountains and valleys between us, all we need is love and trust.

I shall be lonely in my heart, but your sweet smile will be my memories.

Your gentle touch I will recall, and I will keep on loving you

No matter the distance between us, though we shall be far apart

Let our hearts be together, always sharing our love that was meant to be

Giving it breath of growth, when things tend to shake us apart

Let our love be a tower of strength, the trust we have never to share

From the depth of my heart, I can recall the sweet days we shared

They keep on flushing in my mind, although I'll let you go away

I won't let you out of my heart, you will be a pillar of fire in me

Keep me warm in the cold nights, I'll keep on missing you

My lips will dry for lose of your lips, my days will be lonely and boring

Coz I don't have you by me💏

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Best Kept Secret to Get Your Man to Commit

   How long have you dated your present partner?

Some ladies have fallen into the trap of being in a relationship for 5 to 10 years. This is sometimes occasioned by the fear of losing that tall and handsome young man you have met. It could be that you had remained lonely for a long time before meeting him and you're now afraid of falling back to loneliness if you left him.

You think of those sweet words that are whispered into your ears when you're together. You remember the care and attention he showers on you. He lifts you up when you're feeling emotionally drained and when you express your feelings to him, he grants you a listening ear. You remember how he had taken you around the World in '7' days and all the great memories you've had together. Not to talk about the explosive orgasmic sexual episodes you do have together.

With all these seemingly great relationships, the man is still not proposing to you.

There are some, however, whose relationships have been violent and turbulent, and yet the lady finds it so difficult to leave the man. Neighbors often break doors to separate fights but the lady refuses to call it quits.

This is worrisome as is disturbing. The question is: why is this so?

When you look back, it's been a long time. You have spent the prime part of your life with him and you begin to imagine the societal blame and shame. You see yourself a 100% loser if you should chicken out after these donkey years.

In the course of cohabitation, you have even taken in and delivered a baby. Some have even delivered one, two, three children without any commitment from the man. It has become a matter of between and betwixt. You can neither go forward nor go backward. It has become a dilemma both for the man and the woman.

True love is a wonderful experience. When two people who deeply care for each other come together, there's a spark of transformation. They want to please each other. They want to support each other. Having found each other worthy in character and value, your man will quickly propose to you. You'll then marry the love of your life and experience the kind of relationships you had ever dreamed about together.

A relative of mine found herself in this mess. Today, she had begotten 3 children in cohabitation. The 'husband' claimed that she often complains, nags, and easily gets angry. He complained of a lack of peace in his life and his family ever since he came in contact with her. On the other hand, his 'wife' insisted that she had been used and abused and so, she cannot allow him to dump her and marry another woman. At the moment, the focus has even shifted from marrying her to the education of the resultant children from the cohabitation.

So, how can you make your man commit to you even when he thinks he's not ready yet for the responsibility of marriage?

You have to develop an impeccable character. Are you open? Are you kind? Are you considerate? Are you charitable? Are you approachable? You need to be a confident woman.

There is no free lunch anywhere these days. You have to be an industrious woman. Are you an employee? Are you an entrepreneur? How much are you bringing to the table? If you want to be the woman men rush to propose to, you must be able to contribute to the domestic economy. Gone are the days when women are liabilities!

You must be supportive. It's not only about supporting your partner financially but also, encouraging him to accomplish his goals. You advise him whenever he demands it from you. And most importantly, ensure he enjoys peace whenever you're together.

When you exhibit these traits, men will be falling over themselves to commit to you. They'll be desperate to propose to you. You'll be the one qualifying them and doing the selection. The challenge you'll have is the ability to choose the perfect life partner for you.

I do remember

 

 From the day I left you, my heart got empty

I got a scar never to heal, a space in my heart never to fill

I thoughts things would be okay, all these were dreams never to come true

Coz things got worse and worse, every time I spent away

Don't think i'll ever forget I do remember our love

Whenever I remember, the sweet dream we shared

Good times we had, all I do is weep

But can't make things complete, your smile made me crazy

Your touch drove me mad, but now I don't have

Somebody to smile down at me, somebody to touch me

Am all but lonely,

I promise you my future, together with you

The distance between us, keep everything a halt

But still remember you, miles and miles away

I can still hear the echo of your love, the vibration of your touch

Miles and miles away I still remember

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I'm missing you

  

Though you are far away, your heart is here with me

Your love abide in me, forever shall it be

The time of our lives, every second that count

Every heartbeat that goes, my heart is missing you

I need you close to me, to keep me warm at night

To be with me long days, and keep on loving me

Though the distance is great, we got to love more

I'm missing you, keeping good memories

Of the times we used to share, wish that it can happen again

But my dreams keep on being shut, by the distance between us

As my heart pound each bit, the sun rises n sets

I count the seconds passed without you, I wish we were together

Forever never to stop, no matter how far you are

I keep on loving you, I cherish more of your love

I treasure what we shared, whenever we are together

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I can't get through

  

Why give me such pain, seeing you walk away

After giving you all my love, now you wanna leave me alone

You filled my heart with love but wanna leave it empty

Why give me such pain, seeing you walk away

Recalling the day we met, strangers we were to each other

But love erupts from within, we promised never to break our hearts

Now you wanna go, breaking mine, I can't get through such pain

Remember that day, you swore by the moonlight

Never to break my heart, I can't get through such pain

I got a great love for you, I can't let go no matter what

Don't break my heart, by leaving me

Why give me such pain, to see you walk away

Hold back your move, spare our love

I won't break your heart, I'll always treat you right

Don't give me such pain, to see you walk away

Poetry of Sex

 

 

I am deeply thoughtful of poetry, particularly when related to sex. One of the medieval poems that have impressed me is the "Song of Songs". This song refers to the love between God and the soul. God is deeply in love with us and wills our love in return. This love between the soul and God, which is the most intimate love possible, is expressed in the analogy of bride and bridegroom, where the intimacy of love is especially expressed. Nothing can be more intimate than this love where a bride and her love enter into a carnal embrace. In history, no book has received such intensely devoted attention in commentary and preaching as this song.

The composer of this song was Bernard of Clairvaux. He was a French abbot and the primary reformer of the Cistercian order. The Song does not have the same importance as earlier, but nevertheless, it is a part of modern people's imagination. Bernard preached eighty-six homilies on the Song and died just as he was getting started on chapter 3

The song and Lusty thoughts

The song is often read in modern days as a lusty celebration of sex People like me read it to brush aside the prudish poetry and try and peep into the sex acts of Solomon and his Shulammite ( women of Jerusalem). Thus the contemporary obsession is projected by the ancient text. It assumes that everybody knows about sex and it's depth. Perhaps in modern times we have outgrown old romantic notions of sex and know it more as a clash of bodies and exchange of fluids. There is thus no magic and no mystery in it. The song is disguised pornography that gives sex a sacred image. It represents the confusion of that age.

The Erotic Poem

The song teaches a lot. Robert Alter has made a telling observation. As per him, the song is the epitome of erotic literature. The theme states that the body in the act of love seems to displace the rest of the world.

The song affirms joyful love. In the poem, Solomon is a lover who abandons the world for the love of his bride. The beauty of the song is that he rediscovers the world and loves her. This glorious insight is enough to justify the song as great literature.

The song itself sinks the reader into something deeper. The song gives the poem a cosmic look. The strength of love is comparable to forces of decay and destruction i.e. death and Sheol.

Further discussion

Despite all allusions to god, the poem is an erotic piece. As per the poem, love, like wine is the intoxicating desire of carnal knowledge. This is disguised as sexual attraction. The theme covers all this and brings out that God invites his beloved into the "house of wine". Wine is a fitting trope for the one love because it is a fitting trope for the other. Forests, orchards, and gardens are figures of the temple, The lover's enthrallment to his beloved is the Lord's enthralled fascination for his people, black but beautiful.

The song brings out something that has been known since time immemorial that sex is an allegory and it includes metaphysics theology and cosmology. For Christians, sexual difference and union is a type of Christ and the church: How could an erotic poem (and in the Bible!) be anything but allegory?

Poetry like this brings out the truth of human sexuality. Only as an allegory does the Song have anything to teach us about sex. Only as an allegory can the Song play its central role in healing our sexual imaginations.

Last word

How similar this is to the Tantra of Hinduism where sex is unadulterated bliss and a path to God and salvation. This poem also explores the union of man and woman in a similar vein. I am sure friends will now read this poem along with the Tantra as espoused in the Puranas and conclude that sex has a definite place in the world and cannot be brushed under anything.